So last Wednesday, my brother had a car crash and wrote his car off. It’s fucking terrifying knowing that his life could have been taken in a split second. He’s the most important person in my life, and i’m more scared to lose him, then anyone else. I can’t believe i could have lost him. I don’t wan’t to accept it. :<

 I have no energy to get out of bed anymore, i don’t want to deal with the world. My anxiety has been playing up so bad. Whenever i go out into public, even if it’s with people i’m comfortable with, i instantly start freaking out and go to the bathroom and throw up. Dropped caps on Thursday night, i’ve been tripping and all spacey ever since, i don’t feel real. Everything is fucking with my head so much, i don’t remember who i am. 

I despise what I’ve become.